📞 Hello? Hi. It’s me, Jen Glantz. Welcome to the 1-800-Bridesmaid, by Bridesmaid for Hire. A place where real stories are shared and your best advice is given.
This week: A bride feels unwanted because her fiance’s parents are threatening to not come to the wedding over religious differences.
Last week: I shared a chapter of my new book: Finally the Bride
Hold please:
Ps. Anyone who grabs my new book: Finally the Bride on Amazon this week gets a free Newlywed Card Game mailed to them! The perfect gift for an engaged/married friend + or yourself! Hit reply with a screenshot of your order + address details and the card game is yours!
One more Ps.! We are hiring a social media strategist/content creator based in NYC for freelance work. If you/someone is interested, have them reply to this email and I’ll share more!
Dear 1-800-Bridesmaid,
My fiancé and I have been together for a year and are planning our wedding for this fall, but we've hit a serious hurdle.
His parents are Conservative Jewish, and they're strongly against our marriage because I'm Catholic. They haven't even met me yet, but they're already upset because I won't be raising our future children Jewish, I wear a cross necklace, and I'm active in my church community. The fact that I won't consider conversion is especially problematic for them.
What makes this more complicated is that my fiancé is actually completely secular but hasn't told his parents. He was raised Jewish but hasn't practiced since college. I'm a practicing Catholic but open to incorporating some Jewish traditions into our lives. We share the same core values despite our different backgrounds. We've also discussed children extensively and plan to expose them to both faiths and let them choose their own path when they're older, though his parents don't know this yet.
The situation is getting tense because they're threatening to skip the wedding entirely. We were planning an intimate ceremony with about 50 people, so having his whole family absent would leave a painfully obvious gap. My fiancé is starting to suggest we just elope to avoid the conflict, but I've always imagined having a traditional church wedding. I don't think it's fair that I should have to give up my dream wedding because of their disapproval.
His parents aren't likely to cut him off completely - they adore him, and while they're unhappy, disownment isn't on the table. I've told my fiancé I might need to maintain some boundaries with them, but I fully support him keeping his relationship with them. They live in New York while we're in Boston, so he can visit them independently if needed.
What should I do? Should I give up my dream of a traditional wedding to keep the peace, or should we proceed with our plans even if it means his family won't attend?
-Kristin
Any advice for Kristin or know someone who was in a similar situation? Share it here:
💗 A Few Things I’m Loving:
I just bought this sweatshirt in a few colors. Size up so it’s extra comfy! But I plan to live in these this winter with jeans or leggings.
I’ve worn these pants so much that I had to get a second pair. I sized up too so they are a little baggy but still fit nice.
I’ve shared this before because I love in the two that I have. Grabbing one more in these sale colors. I size up 2-3 sizes in this so it’s extra baggy and comfy.
My favorite sneaker of the year.
I live in this sweatshirt. I have it in white and black.I mostly wear workout clothes so I invested in a matching set that looks great and makes my workout attire feel put together. These pants are my favorite and this sports bra is great too. Expensive, but comfortable and fits well. I got it in light blue and black.
I just wore this dress to a wedding this weekend. It is now my favorite dress in the entire world.
What’s new with Bridesmaid for Hire:
Jen Glantz here! I’m so grateful you’re here. I started 1-800-Bridesmaid as a way to bring you into the world of my life as a hired bridesmaid for strangers.
If you’re wondering what I’ve been up to lately, here’s a little preview:
A lot of you are reaching out to see if we are still hiring. Yes, but at the moment, there aren’t any open positions. I’ll keep you posted inside the newsletter when open positions to work weddings pop up.
My new book Finally the Bride is now available on Amazon!
My team and I developed these interactive maid of honor/best man speech, wedding officiant speech, and wedding vow tools. You chat with us about the stories, details, and memories you want to include and I write the speech for you — in just a few hours. If you have a wedding coming up and need a speech, check this out. We’re expanding this month to offer wedding officiant and father of the bride/goom and mother of the bride/groom speeches.
I'm Jen Glantz and this is my Bridesmaid for Hire newsletter.
If you want to stop getting emails from us, we understand. You can hit the unsubscribe button and you’ll never hear from us again.
Keep your plans, they are clearly important to you. If his parents choose not to be there, that is their choice. Hopefully they’ll change their mind in time or eventually.
Before making a decision on wedding plans, future hubby needs to have a serious convo (or multiple) with his parents about his observance, and his plans with the kids. It’s important that this comes from HIM and that your name is nowhere near this topic. After that, gauge their response and decide from there what the best course is for you. This isn’t your responsibility, it’s your fiancé’s because they’re HIS parents.