Right now you are in all the emotion and excitement of planning and anticipating a dream wedding. The dress. The cake. The venue. Then the wedding day comes and goes. And then itās the marriage. Marriage can be great. Itās work though. Hard work. Itās continuing to choose the same person to go through it all with day after day. Great times and ugly.
Do you want to start the next phase of your life married to someone who still needs to figure out his feelings for you? Someone who isnāt all in even before the really tough things even start?
You canāt see it now but the money spent, would still be spent later down the road. But thereās a big red flag saying divorce could already be on the table, and then youāll have the turmoil and financial obligations of that. Possibly kids. And the added guilt or shame of your family saying divorce is a sin.
This choice is heartbreaking either way. Enter a marriage knowing your spouse isnāt 200% in, hoping he changes. Or face the emotional challenge of calling off the wedding.
Iām headed towards my 18th anniversary. If this were my story, my older self would be telling you -you deserve more. You deserve it all. You deserve someone who isnāt confused or stuck on his ex. I wish you the best.
Your family believes that divorce is a sin, however, youāre not married yet. Simply engaged. If your gut tells you this marriage is a bad idea, LISTEN TO IT. If you believe in God or a higher power, pray on it and if not, just listen to your intuition. Yes all this money was spent and that is unfortunate and people will be upset about it. But guess what. Your heart, your mental health is what matters. Put you first. Marriage is a big effing deal. If youāre seeing that it wonāt end well and your fiancĆ©e is saying heāll āfigure out his feeling eventuallyā is a MASSIVE red flag. I donāt know about the rest of your relationship, only you do. Donāt let what other people believe in or say influence you into something you may think is wrong. Do what YOU think is best for yourself and your future. What I said is just my two cents and what I believe in. You donāt have to take my advice. I wish you all the love and the luckā„ļøbelieve in yourself. You are loved. Anyone who says otherwise is stupid. š
It is so much cheaper to cancel a $45K wedding than to marry the wrong person. In dollar costs, as well as mental health costs.
When you cancel, I am sure you will be surprised at the love and support you receive from people you worry will judge you.
Right now you are in all the emotion and excitement of planning and anticipating a dream wedding. The dress. The cake. The venue. Then the wedding day comes and goes. And then itās the marriage. Marriage can be great. Itās work though. Hard work. Itās continuing to choose the same person to go through it all with day after day. Great times and ugly.
Do you want to start the next phase of your life married to someone who still needs to figure out his feelings for you? Someone who isnāt all in even before the really tough things even start?
You canāt see it now but the money spent, would still be spent later down the road. But thereās a big red flag saying divorce could already be on the table, and then youāll have the turmoil and financial obligations of that. Possibly kids. And the added guilt or shame of your family saying divorce is a sin.
This choice is heartbreaking either way. Enter a marriage knowing your spouse isnāt 200% in, hoping he changes. Or face the emotional challenge of calling off the wedding.
Iām headed towards my 18th anniversary. If this were my story, my older self would be telling you -you deserve more. You deserve it all. You deserve someone who isnāt confused or stuck on his ex. I wish you the best.